


Is he better than my love?

by montes-carpatus (Carpathyah)



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Established Relationship, Failed Marriage, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 04:56:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4551366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carpathyah/pseuds/montes-carpatus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael fights to keep Gavin around.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Is he better than my love?

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by: Bring it On by The Gaslight Anthem

The gray hair was evident near his ears and sections of his head as he looked in the mirror as he brushed his teeth. He stood up straight to exam it. He stopped brushed to sigh, he was in his late thirties and he was already graying. The more he stared at it, the more it bothered him but fascinated him at the same time. His face was still quite young, he could pass for a thirty year old if his age wasn’t known. Though, he had no longer the face of the young Michael Jones when he joined Rooster Teeth and he could live with it.  He gargled and spit out the remaining toothpaste and wiped his mouth with the near-by towel before heading down the hall to the room. The wooden door was covered with stickers and pictures of his favourite cars. Michael slowly turned the handle to open the door and walk in. He glanced repeatedly at the floor; careful not to step on any little toys or blocks. He rubbed the child’s shoulder, who was peacefully asleep.

“Hey buddy, time to wake up,” he greeted. The boy mumbled something before waking up. He had big blue eyes and bright orange hair. The freckles were countless on his face down to his neck, shoulders and many other parts of his body. “Want to wake up Dad with me?” The boy rubbed his eyes and nodded. The boy quickly got out of bed and walked behind his adoptive father, trying not to giggle.

Michael quietly pushed the door to the room he shares with his married partner. He slept quietly on his side of the bed with the covers up to his neck. They slowly tiptoed into the room before Michael signaled for him to go and the boy ran and jumped on the bed.

“Dad! Wake up! You said you would make pancakes today,” he shouted as he continued to bounce. The man slowly awoke to only pull the covers over his head. Michael got a bit annoyed. He did promise and it wasn’t the first time he had ignored his son’s request.

“Yeah, Dad, _you promised_ ,” he said joined in. The dirty blond haired man grumbled some slang words in English before sitting up. Michael mentally prayed that their son didn’t hear them. He looked exhausted and Michael knew exactly why and it killed him.

“Good morning, I’m up to make those pancakes,” he said before he yawned. He was shirtless and looking around the room for his pair of jeans. Once he found them, he pulled them on quickly as he can before picking up the boy in his arms and followed Michael to the kitchen. He found the batter already prepared and placed the boy on his designated chair. The boy was almost eight years old but Gavin would sometimes insist on carrying him. Michael sat across from him, asking what flavour he wanted. He would glance at his husband, hoping for a morning kiss but it never came and he could feel his heart sink into his stomach once again.

“Taylor, mind getting the orange juice out of the fridge?” Michael had asked politely. The boy nodded his head happily before going to the fridge. Michael had gotten up too, to kiss Gavin’s shoulders to hope he would receive some love in return. All he got was a peck on the cheek when he was begged for a real kiss. He walked away to give attention to Taylor, who was happily carrying stuff from the fridge to the table.

Gavin had placed a plate of pancakes on the table and they began to eat. Both listened to Taylor going on about his elementary school classes and his friends. Michael would listen carefully but Gavin was only half-listening and countlessly looking at his cellphone.  

They had helped dress the boy and waited in the front yard for the long yellow bus. Michael kissed his head and Gavin messed up his hair as the yellow doors opened and he walked in. As the bus drove away, Gavin was first to walk towards the house. Michael kept his calm up until now but it was up to a boiling point and he followed him. He slammed the door behind him.

“Jesus fucking Christ Gavin, can you at least fucking try to care? What kind of bullshit is this?” He yelled. Gavin quickly turned around, taken aback from the sudden anger. It made Michael even more furious that he wasn’t wearing his wedding band.

“What are you yelling about? I care about Taylor! I-” He defended.

“You haven’t been fucking home in about four days you moron, I fucking know, you can’t hide it from me,” he interrupted. He was on borderline tears. The ring gone, the lonely bed, taking care of their son and having to lie when he asked where Dad had gone for the night. Gavin’s eyebrows narrowed and then softened. He was at lost for words. “You’re cheating on me, with who, I don’t know, I shouldn’t fucking care but, I do.” He felt sweat form on his forehead and his curls getting in the way. He pushed them back and looked at the ground, trying not to get his broken heart get to his head. “What does this marriage mean to you Gavin? We’ve been married for eleven years. I thought you loved me, because fuck, I still love you.”

“This marriage,” Gavin started. Michael just stared at him. He caught his eyes and Gavin immediately looked away. He didn’t continue nor did Michael have the strength to press on. He didn’t rebuttal the accusation.

“Tell me what you want me to do to get you to love me back,” Michael said calmly. Biting his lip so he wouldn’t cry.

“I don’t know Michael, I don’t know,” Gavin replied.  He just stood there and stared at him. Gavin wasn’t aging quite well for someone in his mid-thirties. His dark blond hair had now changed an almost darker shade of brown. He didn’t have the white strands like Michael but his eyes looked terribly exhausted all the time even though he had been sleeping better since Taylor grew up. He had gotten a little pudgy, although, he still remained this tall and skinny Englishman. He wasn’t always as chipper as his youth and he constantly needed reading glasses. Though, Michael still found him as beautiful as the day he realized his feelings for him thirteen years ago. His blue eyes still made him weak in the knees and how he searched for his body in the bed they shared. He still remembers Gavin’s reaction when he pulled out the black velvet box with the ring inside and how they traveled all the way to New York state to get married, aware that their privileges wouldn’t be the same when they got back to Austin.

Michael felt numb the rest of the day and sat around editing his footage for the coming Monday. He felt more aware of the gold band around his finger than ever before and he controlled himself from removing it. Gavin went to go work at the office on his day off, probably wanting to  get away from the tension. His eyes would refer back to his old social media posts of Gavin and him. Looking at pictures of their wedding and their endless dates, he searched for when things fell apart. The most recent ones looked forced and even his fans began to notice something was wrong. Of course, he ignored them at first but he started to see things that were off. His best friend Lindsay even pulled him aside at work to say that she was worried. Michael pulled her close and told her he would do anything for Taylor.

He believed in fixing what was broken and not leaving it to die. Divorce had come up more than once but his eyes would begin to water and he would curse until the thought was gone. He so concentrated on getting Gavin to love him again.

He started with little things, like making him his favourite breakfasts and  holding his hand. He would wake him up gently in the morning, giving him light kisses on his cheeks to then place a bigger kiss on his lips. He wasn’t sure if Gavin noticed but he tried anyways.

“Michael, I know what you’re doing,” Gavin confronted him one evening. Michael had two mugs of tea in his hands and crawled on the sofa to cuddle next to him.

“I don’t understand,” he lied. “I can’t come to sit next to my husband?”

“No, it’s not that, just, you’re not making this easy for me,” Gavin confessed. Michael’s heart dropped into his stomach. He was losing.

Gavin didn’t come to bed that night and after he had helped put Taylor to bed, he snuck out of the house, leaving Michael an empty bed. He cursed and screamed into the pillow.

“It’s not fucking fair!” he cried but he muffled it with the pillow. “I gave you everything, and you’ve left me with absolutely nothing.” He sniffled back tears. “I hope he treats you well though.”

He wanted to call someone, anyone. Through the watery blur, he dialed Ray’s number. Ray was his close friend since before they started to work together. He was the voice of reason and he god damn needed reason now. The phone rang in his ear, waiting for Ray to answer. He heard the other line pick up but there was no voice, just muffles and moans.

“Fucking hell Gav, you pushed off my cell phone,” he heard the familiar voice say in between sucking noises. He turned off his phone immediately. No, it wasn’t true. He couldn’t believe it. He ran a hand through his hair. He felt the hot tears stream down his cheeks but he didn’t sob. He had to stay strong for his son. He heard his door creak open and a tired Taylor appeared. With his Banjo plush in his arms and his race car pyjamas on, he crawled into the large bed.

“Where’s Dad, Papa?” he asked. Michael tried wiping away the tears from his eyes. It was dark enough in the room so he wouldn’t see him cry.

“He just went out for a little bit, he’ll be back home soon, okay?” he said in a shaken but fatherly voice. He pulled him close, kissed his head repeatedly and eventually fell asleep with the young boy in his arms. Gavin wasn’t there the morning after and for the rest of the day.

“Lindsay, can I talk to you?” he asked. She was alone in the kitchen with her mug of coffee. Lindsay had aged too. Her long red hair was now a bob but she retained her cheery round face with only a small amount of wrinkles.

“Yeah, sure,” she agreed and they sat at the table. Michael explained to her the phone call.

“No, no, he’s cheating on you with Ray, that’s fucking crazy,” she at once shocked but angry. Michael was her best friend and how dare Gavin cheat on such a kind soul. “Do you want me to go beat him up? To a pulp with a baseball bat?”

“No no, I’m just going to show Gavin that I’m worthy of those wedding vows,” he said with his head down. Lindsay saw him holding his hands tightly together and placed her hands on his. She rubbed his knuckles.

“You’re an amazing husband Michael, do what you think is best, okay? I’ll always be here if you need me to beat him up,” she comforted. Michael bit his lip and smiled. He knew he could count on her to listen to him without getting too riled up. She knew he was heartbroken but he wouldn’t give up without a proper fight.

He decided to step up his strategy. He wouldn’t attack Ray, he didn’t have the heart. It wasn’t his fault. Instead, he wanted to prove how much of a good husband he was. That Wednesday morning, Gavin was first to go to work and Michael rushed to the florist. He bought the biggest bouquet he could afford at that moment. He pushed the doors open and he could hear co-workers awe and clap him on. He entered the office with a bouquet of five dozen roses.

“Gavin, I love you,” he told him before putting the roses in his face. Everyone in the office turned to cheer him on, except for Ray. Who looked up at him from his desk. Michael caught his eyes but didn’t smile. Ray looked away.

“Thank you, Michael,” Gavin blushed and took the bouquet in his hands, looking for a place to put them. What Michael saw already on Gavin’s desk almost gave him a heart attack. There was a single rose with a ribbon tied around it. It was in a water bottle near his computer screen. He overdid it. He overdid it like a teenage boy in high school. He pulled Gavin by the arm, he needed to show him. He opened the bathroom door and pushed him in. He hadn’t done that since their engagement. He pressed Gavin against the wall with his chest. His hands held tightly around his waist as he stared him in the eyes. Gavin’s eyes were shocked as his hands hovered around Michael’s hips. Michael kissed him hard, grinding against him. He pulled him as close as he could, wanting to feel the lust and romance from their youth. He stopped to look at him. His lips were bright red and his cheeks were flushed.

“I can give you as much love as Ray could, even more, I always have and I always will,” he told him. He put his knee between Gavin’s legs, rubbing against him. He could feel his partner grip tightly at his back. He heard Gavin grunt and moan. He cupped his face to kiss him again. His beard scratched his palms and his heart sped up.

He thought he succeeded, because that night they had made passionate love for the first time in three years.

“Is this what you wanted? You could’ve just asked you cheating dick,” he cursed in Gavin’s ear as he thrusted from behind. Their bodies were sticky with sweat and Gavin was gripping the sheets. It was exhilarating and Michael believed that this was just what they needed. He saw the marks on Gavin’s back that were fading away. He leaned down to bite at his shoulders and neck to make new marks that weren’t hidden.

He thought he won, Gavin was laying on his chest asleep everything seemed right. He pet his shaggy brown hair. He loved him with every fibre of his being.

A week went by and everything seemed back in place. Gavin was home, helping out with their son and they drove to work together. Michael kissed him more often and he would laugh off that Gavin even cheated in the first place. He believed he had his husband back where he belonged: in his arms.

It all came crashing down when there was a suitcase at the entrance of their home after he picked up Taylor from school. He quickly dialed Lindsay’s number and asked her to pick up Taylor at his house.

“What’s wrong Papa?” he innocently asked. “Why is Dad’s suitcase at the door? Is he leaving?” He picked him up in his arms. He walked back and forth in the front yard as he waited for Lindsay to arrive.

“I’ll deal with this okay buddy? Aunt Lindsay is coming to pick you up,” he comforted. That’s when Gavin walked out with another suitcase. He froze in place as he saw Michael in the yard with tears streaming down his face and Taylor in his arms.

“Wait until Lindsay is here,” Michael yelled. Lindsay’s car screeched as she parked right in front. Michael put Taylor on the ground so he can run to Lindsay who took him into the car.

“I’m sorry Michael,” he apologized. He tightened his fists.

“No! For fuck’s sake Gavin, I’ve done everything for you and now you’re going to leave me? You’re going to go off with Ray?” he screamed. He didn’t care who heard.

“I’ve fallen out of love with you, and, now I love Ray,” his face stayed emotionless. Michael’s knees fell under him. He didn’t know what he could do, one last time, to perhaps change his mind. He wanted to stop crying but he couldn’t. Gavin stood in front of him with a look of sympathy. “I’m sorry, so very sorry, it’s not your fault,” he whispered.

“Hope he treats you well. If _he’s better than my love, then go on, take it all_ _,_ ” Michael cried as Gavin walked past him with his suitcases. He bent over in the grass, sobbing his heart out and covering his head with his hands.

He was gone. All was left was the gold band on the kitchen counter with a letter of apologies that Michael refused to read. All he could do was give his son his entire heart and hoped time would heal.


End file.
